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What to Do When You Just Feel Like Giving Up!

This weekend was my period weekend. I had very few PMS signs and was quite looking forward to it being a mild one, like the ones I used to get before the whole miscarriage thing. Well, it wasn’t to be and yesterday, I spent the day in bed, watching movies and experiencing quite intense first day pain.

I felt really low about it. I started crying and really feeling sorry for myself. I felt like all my work was not doing a thing! All this natural stuff, all these super foods and cutting out foods wasn’t making the slightest difference. Was this whole thing a complete waste of time? My partner was there to support me through this emotional relapse and it was clear that the hormones had taken their toll on me! Truth is, I have come a long way and there were a few realizations I made yesterday about all of this, which I thought I would share to hopefully make you feel better… if you are having a low moment.

1. We can’t control everything

I know for me there is a terrible need to have control over everything. I feel like the more control I have over circumstances, situations and what I eat, the more prepared I can be, and things will somehow be easier to deal with. It is simply not true and it doesn’t matter how well we try and prepare or preempt situations, we still get thrown curve balls. Things in life are not predictable and we need to allow life to just happen and deal with whatever comes up when it does. Being in control all the time is a stress in itself and it is best just to let some things go.

 

2. For me, there is no other choice

I realized yesterday when I was crying my eyes out that the reality is… I don’t see any other choice but to keep going with what I have been doing. Nothing prior to this worked even half as well. So, I have one day of pain in a month… that is NOTHING compared to what I used to experience! Choosing to heal the natural way has worked miracles and I need to remember just how far I have come. I wouldn’t choose any other options now.

 

3. More exploring and trying can always be done

It doesn’t matter where you are in your healing journey, you can always find new and more stuff to try. I know there are heaps of things I still want to explore and do for my body. There are so many detoxes and fasts which I want to do! Detoxing is one of the most rewarding tools for getting faster and more obvious improvements. When you feel like there is no way forward, try one of these, which can be done over a week, and it is amazing what a difference it can make. I am scheduling in my first liver flush for this year in March!

 

4. Acknowledge the achievements of others

I sometimes get jealous of others. I know, you probably do too. I get jealous because I want to be further in my healing journey. I want to be pregnant or have had a child already or I want to just be done with endometriosis, once and for all. Thing is, I can look at women who have achieved these things and see that it can be done. I can achieve it because they have proven that it is possible. You and I can achieve our own personal goals too.

 

5. Change the “mind chatter”

I know, I get a terrible “mind chatter” when I am sore. My “mind chatter” fills me up with negativity, like “You will never heal this thing!”, “Who are you kidding?”, “Dream on!”, and “Endo can’t be cured!” I get it really bad on these days. I do know it is just “mind chatter” and it will pass in a few days but being aware of your mind chatter and changing it to fix those negative beliefs is crucial to healing. I change mine to, “Well, look how far I have already come!”, “Of course I can heal!” and “My body is strong and healthy!”

 

6. Just concentrate on one day at a time.

Today my focus is just to get through the day. Get through and enjoy this day to the best that I can. Give my body all the nutritional benefits I can find for it. Allow myself to relax and laugh and let it all go. Each day is our choice and each moment of what we fill within it is our choice. We can fill it with super rich, nutrient-dense foods or nasty emotional crutch foods. We can choose positive thoughts over negative ones. We can choose things that make us happy and make us feel good. Choose those things… each and every day. Choose joy over “must do” and make decisions that ultimately make you happier and healthier.

 

Do you have low days too? What realizations have you made with yours? How does your healing journey compare to the past? Would love to hear your thoughts…

Hugs, Melissa x
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This Post Has 11 Comments

  1. Lilly

    I completely understand were you all are coming from but you have to find ways of cheering yourself up! It’s so easy to fall into anger and depression, those are some of the easiest emotions to have… and the hardest to get rid of.

    I was diagnosed with stage IV endo. It was so bad that when my Dr did surgery on me, she said she could not find my uterus! She even said that if there was ever a stage 5, i would be it… not exactly what anyone wants to hear. After lots of pills, shots, and pain, my RE suggested that i try IVF. I always thought that IVF was for those desperate women who couldn’t possibly have babies any other way, well it turned out that i was one of them. After taking a second mortgage in my house (my insurance didn’t cover it), i went through the IVF process and i was very hopeful. Due to the severe stage of my endo, the procedure didn’t work and i spend all of that $$ for nothing. The worse part was when the Dr told me that the only way i wil EVER get pregnant is by using a donor egg because my ovaries have been so damaged, that the quality of my eggs will not be good.

    Have you any idea of how demoralizing this is?? Has any one ever been told something like this? I felt about an inch tall after that last Dr. appointment, so i haven’t been back.

    A funny thing happened though, I chose for my diagnosis to go in on one ear and out on the other. I decided to ignore the demoralizing comments, and have resolved to take care of my self holistically and spiritually. I KNOW for a fact that i will have my precious children, i just don’t know when/how God is going to make it happen, but i know he will. All i’ve got to do is keep my self as healthy and whole as possible, and the rest is up to the Almighty.

    Melissa, i am curious as to what are your thoughts about IVF. Honestly, i did it out of desperation due to my age and advanced stage of endo. Now i plan on turning to acupuncture.

    Please wish me luck!

  2. Melissa

    It is a pleasure Divya 🙂 There are better options for sure!

  3. divya

    thanks Melissa for Ur free book u send i too suffered from endo 2 yrs before took all hormone medicines and suffered a lot due to its side effect of hormone tablets again i face endo before 2 months i decide not to do lapro or hormone tablets so i decide to go natural thanks for creating a blog to help all girls who suffer from endo and ur really giving us strength….thanks

  4. Melissa

    That is so wonderful to hear Danielle and I am glad I am here for you – even if it is just in spirit 🙂 You can do this and you can get better. I am doing a juice fast next week, which could be an option for you too. Will keep you posted on what happens 🙂
    Hugs and welcome. Also, you should join the facebook group for extra support: https://www.facebook.com/endoangels

  5. Danielle

    I am 19 and I was diagnosed with Endo this past June. In the last 2 years I had struggled with all the pain and confusion of what was going on with my body. Not knowing about natural healing, I allowed my obgyn to convince me to take the depo shot for my pain and periods. Unfortunately, the shot just ruined my life further: made my pain worse and gave me a “continuous” period. To this day, I am still on my period as of 4 months ago when I started. I have not been on the shot for 2 months but I guess that stuff is still in my system, wrecking havoc on my hormones. After finding this site a few months ago, I have been consciously turning my life in the direction of natural healing… I am truly convinced it is the only way to my recovery. Yesterday was one of those “days” for me like you described above.. But Today, I feel good and like you said, there is no point on giving up now, considering I have felt my best in the last 2 months by changing my lifestyle than I have in the last 2 years. Thank you for the inspiration.. I cant help my smile knowing I am not alone in this.

  6. Melissa

    Thanks Amy. That is very inspiring 🙂 Lovely blog too!

  7. Melissa

    Thanks beautiful 🙂 That is a lovely comment. You are so lucky and your daughters are so lucky to have you 🙂

  8. Melissa

    Thanks Katharine 🙂 It is all about letting go sometimes…

  9. Katharine Trauger

    Keep on. The body can be slow to catch the idea. Next time could be even better. I think of training myself (my body) to sleep better, which takes several attempts before it all “sinks in”. Same for other functions. More time. 🙂

  10. France

    Hi Melissa. Thank you for sharing your thoughts. I just went through the same lately when i feel pain has came back and it s more and more painful every month. When I feel like this when i feel there a no light at the end of the tunnel I do think about hysterectomy and give it a try. I heard some women live well and actually much better like this than the endo.
    Anyway, i managed to find strength in me i find when i look at my two daughters that i m lucky to have and my boyfriend i live so much. I have read that adhesion can be as painful as endo and it s different that endo. Adhesion grows after surgery and will cause endo if not treated. Adhesion needs to be massaged and treatment is a bit different. So i m trying to treat adhesion now and it seems to be working. That is the case for me and i know we are all different but i thought i d share this with you.
    So like you, when I feel like I wanna give up everything and just go for the easy solution, i try to think about something i haven t looked into. Or as you say try something i haven t done.
    I ordered an enema kit. I heard they are amazing for the liver. I think this will help me too.
    After all the endo is a big journey towards better knowledge on how to stay healthy in this toxic world. And sometimes i m hrateful cause if i d never had endo i wouldn t be experimenting fermented food or i wouldn t help my daughters in eating great food instead of just good food and so on.
    So let s stick together and after all life is beautiful!!
    Good luck
    France

  11. Amykinz @ Foodie 4 Healing

    First of all, hugs my sweet friend. I’ve been in your shoes, so I know how the lows feel. It’s normal to have those. The key is to not STAY there. I have come so far in my reaction to this disease. As you know, I just had another lap. I wasn’t expecting it to be as bad in there as what they found. It’s literally everywhere, despite my efforts for natural methods of healing. I could do what I did just 2 years ago and crawl in a hole and pit of despair. But, I didn’t. I am so proud of myself! I realized that I can do what I can do and certain things help my pain (like what I put in my mouth) but like you said, I can’t always control what happens with this disease. And I found my strength in the Lord. I actually just wrote a blog post about this. You can view it here, if you haven’t already: http://foodie4healing.blogspot.com/2013/02/why-im-grateful-for-endometriosis.html

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