My Uterus Has Been Feeling Neglected

I had an amazing weekend! I spent it at a Self Healing Maya Massage course and have learnt so much about the body and the amazing healing benefits of Mayan Massage—don’t worry, I will post a video on it for us soon.

One of the exercises which we did as a group was a meditation, which was a recording by the women who introduced Mayan Massage to the western world. Her name is Dr. Rosita Arvigo—one amazing woman!

The meditation started out like I guess most meditations do. It was all about deep breaths and focusing on releasing tension in your body. It then went into a whole other level of meditation, which I have tapped into on my own meditations but this was a little different. Rosita asked us to talk to our individual body parts! Yes, I know this sounds strange but when you are in deep meditation and someone tell you to ask your uterus specific questions, you flow with it, don’t you?

The questions were quite specific. How did your uterus feel when you experienced those laparoscopies? How did it feel when you had your miscarriage? How does it feel, generally speaking? What sexual experiences does it like or dislike? What makes it happy?

It was really strange, but a whole lot of answers started to come back from my now-talking uterus. She told me that she has been feeling quite neglected and unloved. That I have been focusing so heavily on my healing and my endometriosis that I have just not given her nearly the level of attention that she has wanted. I know, you would think that she would also get some of that benefit, but she expressed that I had put little love and focus on her, her inner self, and needed to show her some real love. Okay, I know you probably think this is all a little nuts and on some level perhaps it is. Perhaps, it is more like my inner child that has been begging for some love and attention but either way, using Mayan Massage as a form of loving oneself is so pure and real. It offers some remarkable healing for us but I think personally, it is all that positive intention on the lower abdominal area that makes it so effective. You are giving love and attention to an area, which—let’s be honest here—most of us have tried to ignore for years!

In the first time in a long time I truly feel connected to my body, my inner body and especially that part of my body that I have tried to forget and simply “process” like a machine for so long. I feel a sense of knowing that it is there and that it is here for me. I haven’t felt this for years, if ever. I think, with the big diagnosis of “endometriosis”, I had disconnected from it, to somehow take the emotion out of the “let down” of my body. I was angry for a long time about getting endometriosis and perhaps a disconnect was my way of dealing with it. The same way, I stopped wanting kids and feeling any real emotion about children.

I know endometriosis brings with it a heap of fear and emotion—I am only just realizing how much of it I have been bottling up in the last few months. Perhaps this bottling up is part of our brewing process. Perhaps we need it to ferment and process and eventually it will all come out in a big fuzzy blow out, more like a big crying session! Perhaps it is just part of our journey. I do know that it has made us all so remarkable at being compassionate and loving, as we learn to love ourselves and our bodies so much more.

To me, Mayan Massage has opened a wonderful avenue to really heal not just our physical wounds but also our emotional ones. We can reconnect with all those forgotten bits down there! We can be all women and love ourselves—endo and all!

Have you ever really connected with your uterus, what is going on in there? How you feel about endometriosis being in your body? What emotions does it bring up in you? Do you feel connected to your body, your womanly bits? Do you love it all, even with the endo? .Be honest and feel free to share!