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How to Be Happy You Are a Woman…

I remember the first day I cursed that I was a woman. It was the first day of my period and I was learning all about how to stick a tampon up my vagina. It felt icky, sore and something I really didn’t want to be discussing with anyone, not even my mother. It felt like there was something to be embarrassed about, something that was intimate but not beautiful, an area no one talked about or it was concealed like some dirty, ugly secret.

A few years later, I got my Endometriosis diagnosis and it was at that moment that the constant cursing began. I wished constantly to be a man. I would make statements about it all the time. “If I was a man, then I wouldn’t have this dreaded disease” or “If men had this disease, then they would have found a cure by now”. I was angry and upset and I just wished for something to be different. Unfortunately, I took it out on my body and decided to hate it. I hated that it was sick, that it was weak and that it “gave” me this dreaded Endometriosis that I would have to put up with for the rest of my life!

It was only when I met my husband that my vision of my body started to shift. He showed more respect for my body than I ever did on my own. He gave it real love, he admired its beauty. He embraced its womanly features, with all the curves and little unique qualities. He showed me that it could indeed be loved and when I cursed it, he would kindly remark that I had just one body and that it was capable of amazing things. Nothing more, nothing less.

To be honest, I still secretly wished my body to be different or to somehow be “better”. Better looking, better health and more… something. I don’t know about you but for me, I would dream of it being a super healthy body. One that could run marathons and not collapse after 15 minutes. One that didn’t get pimples, breakouts, lumps, cellulite or a single bit of wobbly fat. I would wake up without bags under my eyes, feel refreshed and alive and instantly alert. I didn’t voice this kind of stuff to my husband  but rather to my girlfriends. Somehow they would relate and share their own “super body” images and wishes for their own bodies. Sadly, us women tend to just delve into the “I hate my body because…” stories so much, which is terribly sad!

Last year, my husband and I travelled through France. It was such an amazing trip and I could seriously go there every few years for a “shot of Frenchyness”!

When we stayed in Bordeaux and walked around the streets, I instantly felt uncomfortable. I wasn’t dressed badly by any normal standards but when I looked around me and the amazing fashions and care the French women had taken, it really made me realize how much they respected themselves and their bodies.

Tips on how to be happy with your body:

1. We truly only have one body

For the first part of my life, I spent a huge amount of time wishing for things to be different. Bigger eyes, longer legs, thicker hair… you know the drill. Now, I realize that we only have what we have and we can only make the most of what that is. Sure, we can enhance aspects of what we have by working out or losing weight etc but ultimately, there is no way I can grow my legs!

2. We are blessed to be women

If a man is unattractive, he is kinda stuck with that. We can use make-up, good fashion sense and high heels to make ourselves look so much better. There is not much a man can do except perhaps put on a swankier suit!

We are a delicate beauty. Without feminine energy the world would be a cold, boring place—think of all that creativity those beautiful colorful designs and those delicate things we so love within our lives: delicate soaps, natural shampoos, home-made creams and lip balms. (Not necessarily created by women but certainly inspired by feminine energy.)

3. Taking care of ourselves shows love for ourselves

When you run a business from home and you generally don’t leave the house, unless you have to pop out to the shops or go for a walk, it is easy to get lazy and live in tracksuit pants and even sometimes your PJs. I know because I did this for a large part of last year! I would be embarrassed every time the mail delivery service guy came because he always assumed I was sick!

After a while, I started to just feel ugly. I would catch glimpses of myself in the mirror and be mortified at how I looked.

I decided that dressing nice and taking care of myself was not actually about looking good for the “outside world” but rather something I did for myself and to feel good about myself. It was amazing how much better I felt when I took the care in the morning to do my hair or put on some nice clothes. PJs are great but when you feel grumpy and icky while working in them, it doesn’t help your work ethic!

4. Femininity is an inner, untapped beauty

After my trip to Bourdeaux, I became much more aware of what I was wearing and how to truly dress in a more feminine way. The French do have a remarkable way of expressing their feminine beauty. I believe it is an art form and it is sooo much fun! We are all individual and unique “dolls” and we can beautify ourselves in amazing ways. Hats, dresses, belts, colors, textures and various designs are all layers of creative expression, which we can lay on our canvas, our bodies. It has nothing to do with our weight or our body shape but rather about playing with our body, as if it were a doll we were dressing up!

Endometriosis Pinterest Pinterest

When we express that and play with that, it livens up our inner feminine beauty and we truly feel empowered in being women!


I started a new Pinterest Board a few weeks ago as a way to inspire our Feminine Beauty. I really love sharing the images of women who have really captured that essence of femininity in their dress and presentability. My mission for 2015 is to express my femininity even more and just love all that my body is. I believe that when we dress to enhance our feminine essence, we are celebrating being women!  PS I will make an effort to find women of all shapes and sizes.

What is your experience with your body? Do you currently feel like you hate your body? Did you ever wish it to be different? Want to join me on my Feminine Expression Resolution? I would love to open my Pinterest Board up and make it a shared board, so we can all contribute and take part in sharing the beauty and feminine essence with other women. If you would like to be part of the board, just write in the comments below or email me and I will gladly add you.

Being a woman is something to be celebrated. Let’s do that in 2015! Lumpy, squishy or strangely designed bits and all!

Hugs, Melissa x
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This Post Has 2 Comments

  1. Melissa

    Thanks Sonrie 😉 I will share more ideas and visuals for sure. Perhaps create a Feminine Series 😉

  2. sonrie

    I love this idea. I’m not on pinterest – I tried butit was too overwhelming actually – but I hope you will share your images and thoughts here. I am looking forward to reading it.

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I'm Melissa

Sick of feeling rubbish and not really moving forward?

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