I remember the day when I first discovered I had endometriosis. I had been on a long journey with my parents and was experiencing a really bad bladder infection. Though my dad had stopped a few times on the trip, my abdomen flared up dramatically and I spent the whole 5 hrs in tears from the pain. The drive seemed to make me feel worse and worse, with my whole body being cramped over, with no relief from going to the toilet or anything else.
We eventually got home and after some antibiotics my bladder infection went away and the large swollen abdomen eventually died down.
Thing is, no one seemed to get that the pain was still there. I went to doctor after doctor and none of them seemed to take me seriously. The symptoms even sounded vague when I mentioned them out loud but the pain was certainly real and I felt it every single day.
I felt like I had this hidden secret pain that was forever pulsating, that no one seemed to understand or be able to appreciate. I am sure you know what I mean!
I still feel that feeling of being misunderstood now.
A couple of months ago I attended a wedding for a friend that I had for many years. It was a whole weekend affair and by the third day, my body was completely shattered. I was sore and exhausted. I had a fever and felt incredibly weak. We decided to leave early on the last day and I thought it would all be okay. Well, a few days ago, my friend brought up that she was rather disappointed that I didn’t stay for the last day. I tried to explain that I was tired and that I just couldn’t stay because I had had a fever. She just didn’t seem to understand. She took it personally that I didn’t stay for the wedding and she couldn’t understand why I would leave and that my “fever” was merely an excuse. It was horrible. I felt so hurt and misunderstood.
Sometimes, I wish other people could see what we feel. Sometimes, I wish endometriosis would show up like a broken leg or a raw open gushing wound in our abdomen. Perhaps then people would understand what we are feeling or how much pain we have experienced. Perhaps, a thermometer like you get in PlayStation games, where it shows your energy levels would be a good one? Mine was on the really low button that day!
I wish sometimes, that someone could touch us and experience what we are feeling, just for a 10 minute span of time, so they would appreciate and know what it really feels like to have endometriosis.
I know that sometimes people misunderstand what we experience and I know that there is a sense of isolation but there is something that is amazing about having this condition… just hear me out.
We are much more compassionate and giving people. We feel with depth and caring because we are so in need of that from others. I see this amazing giving and compassion in my Support Group each and every day. We have an amazingly united spirit in this group and it is amazing to have created it and be a part of it.
The biggest thing I guess I am even more appreciative of is that we have an instant response and measure of what we give and take away from our bodies. We have an instant pain monitoring system in our bodies that measures what foods, supplements or environments are good for us and which ones aren’t. Not many conditions out there provide such an instant response mechanism. This allows us to become the perfect guinea pigs for all sorts of things! We are the true ambassadors for health for all the other people in the world. Think about just how powerful that is!
We are so united in this amazing journey of natural health and I am so blessed to be a part of it!