Established in 2010
I have been having a rough couple of days. Perhaps it is just that James and I are so lost with what to do next, perhaps it is because we are stranded at the end of the week and don’t know where we are going to be living and so it is harder to cope with criticism or perhaps that is all just an excuse and I just struggle with criticism. I started to wonder why this might be. Perhaps I don’t take the criticism in its single form, as in the particular thing I am being criticised about but I take it as it means that everything I do and am is no good. I take the whole criticism as a signal of something bigger, something about me as a person.
Do you do this? Do you find yourself under attack and that it is the whole of you that is being attacked? Meantime it is just a singular thing or event or something that you’ve done that is under attack?
My mother used to always refer to me as being “super sensitive”, that I took everything personally and couldn’t cope with criticism. I feel that statement resonates with me so much today. I hate it though! I hate letting things get to me and feeling like I am not strong enough to cope with a little criticism. It is better when I am above it all. Usually when I am doing something that is bigger than the criticism itself. Then I just turn things around and say I am better than that criticism, but I guess at the moment with so many unknowns perhaps it is just harder to cope with things.
I received my first negative comment on my blog a few days ago. I didn’t even post it up on the blog because I couldn’t cope with it. The girl was really angry and said I shouldn’t be indicating to people that there is a cure, when she felt there wasn’t one. She said my blog was BS and rubbish. It really hurts. I put so much thought into my blog. I think about it every single day and try and come up with solutions for women with Endometriosis and give them a positive and natural way of healing. I was at a point of almost giving up on the blog today but hey, I am writing this instead.
So, what do we do about it?
Well, the reality is that the world is filled with opinions from different people. There will be positive people and negative people and some people simply have their own agendas. We have beliefs about life and diseases and we have a right to those. Some people will choose to share them with you and some feel that perhaps their criticism might help you, on some level. When we take it totally personally we are losing the message in what they are saying. We are not really listening to the point of what they are saying. If we allow ourselves to process what they are saying, without suggesting that it is a personal attack, then we can learn and grow from the criticism.
We can also appreciate that not everyone is going to agree with us or our opinions on the world. This is their choice and it is not to say that their belief is wrong. It is just a different belief that comes from different life experiences.
I am still feeling hurt by the comment but I guess what I need to realise is that it is simply an opinion and not a personal attack on me, as this person doesn’t know me or much about my blog. She simply read one article and then formulated an opinion. I guess this is the dangers of the internet. We cannot communicate through direct people contact so perhaps the message is not always clear or understood.
How about you? Do you cope well being criticised? What do you do? How do you handle it? Does it hurt you for days?
Any suggestions or advice would be great!